Why does my partner take a lot of time to ejaculate?

There are many reasons why your partner may be taking a long time to ejaculate. A study found that the self-reported reasons identified were, in descending order of frequency: anxiety/distress (41%), inadequate stimulation (23%), low arousal (18%), medical issues (9%), and partner issues (8%) (Rowland et al., 2023). It is possible that your partner’s sexual fantasies during masturbation are not possible in partnered sex - that disconnect between fantasy and reality can make the act of sex unsatisfying. Similarly, the actual physical techniques used during your partner’s masturbation may not be possible in partnered sex. Performance anxiety can also play a big role in delayed ejaculation (Norén, 2023). Medications such as antidepressants can also affect your partner’s ability to ejaculate (Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research, 2022).